This week, we bring you a long lost episode of The Amateur Scientist Podcast from way back in the early months of this year. No, not this month. Earlier. Relive those glorious days when octomoms remained anonymous, government science workers watched too much porn on the job, and inhuman opportunists tried to make a buck off of unspeakable tragedy. Sure, all but one of those things is still true today, but in the interest of not contributing to your depression, I won’t say which one.
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Back and well rested from our time off, we’re here with breaking news about ShamWOW! Vince’s hooker problems, Bob’s computer problems, Boston high schools’ vampire problems, Indonesian apple pickers’ Komodo dragon problems, and crabs’ problems with feeling pain while being boiled alive. Hey, and we even have some solutions. Some.
President Obama may have been the victim of the most hilarious assassination attempt of all time. James Dobson is stepping down from everything other than being a douchebag. One of our most annoying celebrities may live forever thanks to cryonics. Bishop Richard Williamson says sorry for upsetting people with his idiocy. Pastor Fred Phelps can’t go to England. And the state of Main tries to steal a copy of the Declaration of Independence that was rightfully stolen by our former British overlords. Join us as we discuss these topics and more on this week’s historic show.
Missionaries in South America need your two dollars, God tries to trick us into thinking the oldest human hair was found in a fossilized pile of hyena poo, Michael Phelps tarnishes the reputation of a company named after a fan of female genital mutilation, Charles Darwin and Walt Whitman were the same man, and the Japanese are very interested in your blood. It’s a supersized Valentine’s Day edition of America’s semi-favorite podcast.
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